I know...it's been ages. How have you been? It's actually been over a month since my last post and I notice my internet audience share has dropped considerably. But with reader loyalty I know this post will bring you all crawling back.

Except that even with a month since my last post I have very little to say. I have instructions from Amanda-Sue to set the record straight and write an errata note: Amanda-Sue wasn't a nightmare to go travelling with, in fact she was awesome...that sort of thing. Except that sounds insincere so I can't say that. I read back through my blog and I'm pretty sure you all get me, or you would have given up reading it a long time ago. So you all already know that my cutting wit is really my self defence mechanism and fear of rejection kicking in and therefore much of what I say is to be ignored or written off as fiction. Ultimately AS was brilliant to travel with and looked after me in those dark few hours when neither of us new if I would live or die in Hanoi and for that I am eternally thankful.

Getting back to the here and now; Work has been keeping me busy. I'm enjoying it. I have the right to work here indefinitely now and come and go as I please. I already qualify for residency (where I get a sticker in my passport that gives me certain rights) and if I stay for 3 years I can get a New Zealand passport (I assume it comes in black) and I get taken to the shire elders and we have a big party with fireworks provided by the white wizard.

I took a little trip out to Piha a couple of weekends gone. It's only about 40 minutes from the centre of Auckland but a world away. Auckland spans this isthmus but the town is sprawled around a naturally protected harbour, so on this side of town there are no waves at all, but the beaches are still nice. Piha is on the other side of the isthmus and there is no protection apart from Tasmania and that's quite a way away. So the waves are huge and the rips a lot more dangerous. But it's much more like what you'd expect a beach to be like. It's also volcanic black sand and I burnt the sole of my foot walking on it.

I went to the sky city casino in town one friday night and lost a hundred bucks very quickly. I started at the $5 black jack table and spent an hour winning and losing until I stopped with $95. Assuming I would never make any real money on that table I went over to the $25 dollar table and promptly lost all my money in less than a minute. Not exactly James Bond, but I smiled and tried to give the impression I throw a hundred bucks away every minute before I went home and cried myself to sleep.

What else? I went round to my friends Tali and Ben's house to help sand down a table that they made themselves. Harder work than I had imagined and not as much fun, but probably better than spending another weekend arranging my clothes into fake people that I can talk to.

Then last night was the main event: Christmas in the park. 200,000 Aucklanders head to the domain (just over the road from my apartment) to listen to various festive / death metal anthems belted out by such celebrities as the 2004 New Zealand Idol runner up and Dave - the guy from Shortland Street. OpShop were the main act (you won't have heard of them, but they aren't as bad as everyone else) followed up by some pretty impressive fireworks. It's surreal listening to Silent Night in 22 degree (that's 72 for you Mum) heat with the sun still up at 9pm, but if you forget it's christmas a good time can be had. A testament to just how good a time is the number of lost kid notices flashing up on the big screen. I'm not naturally prejudiced (what? I'm not) but every single one was described as Samoan or Polynesian which led me to the conclusion that the islander parents come to the park, get coma'd safe in the knowledge that their kids will be rounded up by some responsible event worker and they can pick him up hours later when they have sobered up. It wouldn't be allowed back in the UK, but that's because at an event like that 50% of the crowd would be paedos. Here they live in a time of innocence where hobbits can run around fearlessly.

My friends Trevor and Lou came through town last week. I travelled for a couple of days with those two up the Mekong from Luang Prabang to the Thai border. They finally made it to Auckland and it was great when I was asked at work what my plans were for the evening and I could finally say "oh, I'm meeting up with some friends". People looked incredulously at me and Richard laughed thinking I was joking. So all too briefly the social life picked up, but i also met a couple who are old friends of theirs and I shall be going to watch the Hatton fight tonight with Mark (my new friend by proxy).

Here is a little video of NZ culture to whet your appetite:



You'd think, judging by the 80's style retro haircuts and crazy robot dancing that this would have been popular quite some time ago. But no, in 2006 it reached number one here. So that's about the average. If there is anything that is "in" in the UK now let me know and I'll have about 15 years to prepare for it to arrive here.

And another clip, highlighting the quality of the NZ education system: